With warmer weather in our sights (at least for the next 6 hours), little Buffalonians slowly creep out of their hobbit holes and cautiously poke their noses out into the open air. Could it be….spring? No, probably not, but with the hope of warmer days ahead your friendly bloggers are only looking forward to one thing: Cold drinks.
Our “drinking habits” started to get a little bit questionable around the holidays (but really, whose didn’t?) so we’ve slowed down and settled into mid-winter hibernation mode, enjoying only the occasional romantic bottle of wine (or 3) while sitting on the couch with Don.
It’s time for that to change! Monday is St. Patrick’s Day and you’d better believe these two Irish girlz will think of the holiday as the official kickoff of the next drinking season.
wut to order?!
For us, the most important question preceding a night of debauchery (like last week when we ripped Mardi Gras decorations from the walls at an undisclosed number of Allentown bars) is WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DRINK?
As we are sure that most of you frequently encounter this same dilemma, we have created this handy alcohol-rating system for your convenience.
Margaritas (and tequila in general)
Rating (out of 10): 9.5
Really, a good Margarita is the perfect drink. I’m not talking about those shitty, gag inducing excuses for margs that come out of the machine (I’m looking at you DON TEQUILA), I’m talking about a freshly shaken, delicious slice of heaven that is not made with sour mix. Not too sweet (especially if you get the Spicy Margarita from Cantina Loco), and enough tequila to have you feeling good after just one (ok maybe that’s just me)…what could be better??? Plus, when you are drinking margaritas, chances are high that Mexican food is not far from your clutches. Enough said.
Wine (and Prosecco…and champagne)
Rating: 9
My go-to. The perfect thing to drink in front of the TV when you want just enough to make you sleepy on those nights spent alone on the couch. The perfect thing to get you “happy drunk” if you’re feeling adventurous and embark on multiple bottles of Prosecco before a trip to the bowling alley (…again…just me?). The perfect accessory to create the illusion of classiness. The perfect thing to drink with your parents. Red? White? Bubbly? So many varieties. The mimosa rivals the margarita for best drink ever award. Take us to brunch so we know it’s real. The possibilities are endless. The only reason it didn’t receive a 10 on our scale is that the wine hangover sucks. a LOT. But really, it’s worth it, I promise.
Vodka
Rating: 8.75
Vodka Lemonade: Official drink of the summer. Don’t ask Tricia to make it for you (actually, do ask Tricia to make it for you) unless you don’t want to remember your night. For those of you watching your figures (#bye) it doesn’t get more low-calorie than a vodka soda. Just plz don’t drink flavored Smirnoff…memories of sophomore year of college come flooding back….
Beer
Rating: 8
The problem with beer is that it’s so filling. It tends to fill me up before I’m ready to stop. Which can lead to serious problems such as me having to unbutton my pants or even worse: having to stop drinking. Other than that, you can’t really go wrong with beer (Keystone being excluded from that statement). The perfect thing to drink when sitting around watching sportz, when you can’t decide what to order, when you’re too drunk to drink anything else but still want to be holding something in your hand, and to sip…or chug…on a hot summer’s day at the beach (whaddup corona and lime).
Whiskey
Rating: 7
I am not the biggest fan of whiskey, but when the right mood hits, I will happily down it. A more “manly selection” (probably why Emily has become a self proclaimed whiskey sipper), you can instantly appear more bold if you are sipping straight whiskey. I have tried this once and will be steering clear of repeating it for the foreseeable future. A jack and coke isn’t bad, though. Whiskey shots are what happen late at night when I will down anything someone hands me at a bar…but otherwise, no thank you.
Rum
Rating: 6
I really dislike rum unless it is masked well. Mojitos and dark and stormys are some of the most delicious drinks out there. While in the Bahamas Tricia and I sipped on some rum punch that I will be able to taste forever….yum… Otherwise EW and if you drink rum and cokes HAHAHA what is wrong with you.
Gin
Rating: 4.5
A good gin and tonic is good and oh so refreshing. A bad gin and tonic (like the one Tricia CHUGGED last month when she ordered a “gin and tonic, hold the tonic”) triggers my gag reflex like no other. The taste of gin is way too overpowering for me and it’s hard to be creative with it with limited mixers. Added half a point to the rating only because Gin and juice is my favorite song.
Well, welcome back to the blog…and in case you thought we had matured since last we posted, we have not–as you can see from the subject matter of this post.
Notorious BABs 